Second to One: Sexuality

This is one of the hottest topics of today.  Today I am going to upset or offend some of you.  

This is not intentional on my part but you might be offended by the biblical stance of Life Church; you might be offended out of a sense of equality and human rights that is actually outside of biblical boundaries in some areas.  You may be offended if you feel I do not go far enough today by using statements of condemnation.  

The bottom line is this: the Bible is written down and states certain things clearly so that we can’t argue our preferences in certain things.  

We also need to understand that much of what I am saying today is for the believer - those who have chosen to live Second to One - and is counter-cultural.  

I am reminded that: 1 Corinthians 1:23: but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles…

When we talk about sexuality we’re are not talking necessarily about the sexual act itself, but about the way people are defining themselves today and how they use their bodies.

The issue of relationships, and how we conduct ourselves, as Christians should be the most obvious distinctive between people of the Way and the unsaved.  In reality it is the most indistinct difference between us and the world.  

Why?  We have put our own desires before God’s desires for us.  We’ve chosen to live Second to No One in this area.

This means we have to get back to the teaching of biblical holiness without condemning a generation who have failed.

[Incidentally if you feel this doesn’t apply to you and only the young people we should note that the highest levels of sexual promiscuity are found in the middle aged, followed by those under the age of 24].

So what does the Bible teach about sexuality and the use of our bodies?

1. Sex is a Creation Ordinance

When we use the term ‘creation ordinance’ we are talking of the things that God put in place to bring order to the universe He had just made.  Such ordinances pre-date the Law (an important point for later) and therefore show us how things should be.  They are pre-fall, pre-sin, and therefore speak of the ideal.

Genesis 2:19 Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals.

But for Adam no suitable helper was found. 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

23 The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones
    and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
    for she was taken out of man.”

24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

25 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

Some points to note here:

Firstly there is a compatibility between a man and a woman - there is a design behind the anatomical make up.

Secondly there is a physical union here - one flesh.  Now in the Bible sex was marriage.  When we have the ‘one flesh’ mentioned in the Bible we are actually being told that marriage has occurred, in the sense that there is a physical, emotional and spiritual bonding here.

Thirdly, this is an exclusive relationship.  It involves “leaving and cleaving,” moving away from parents into your own home and being with the spouse forever.

Fourthly, sexuality is celebrated within this relationship.  They felt no shame, even though they were naked (25).

Anything that falls short of this relationship is a result of the Fall - where sin entered the world - in the very next chapter.

As we will see this creation ordinance is referred to later in Scripture and relevant today.

2. Living Clean in a Sexualised Culture.

Now you might be saying, “Well that’s all well and good for you!  You’re married and and happy.  I have needs too!  I need sex!”

I love the Bible.  I love it because it’s an honest book.  It is God’s Word.  The Bible contains His loving commands to us but it also records all manner of human behaviour, good and bad.  This does not mean that the God approves of all this behaviour; it is recorded so we don’t fall into the same traps.

Turn with me to 1 Corinthians:

1 Cor 6:12-20: “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial.  “I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything. 13 You say, “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy them both.” The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 14 By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit.

18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your bodies.

The Corinthians were living in a sex saturated society – even more so than ours.  

Corinth was the centre of the worship of Aphrodite, goddess of love, beauty and fertility.  Her temple dominated their city and it was served by 1000 sacred prostitutes (male and female). 

Corinth was corrupt and evil and known throughout the world for its immorality.  It is into this context that Paul writes this letter to address sexual immorality. 

12: “I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. 

This was a saying of the Corinthians – “I have the right to do anything,”  It was being used as a catch phrase to justify their behaviour.  Paul refutes it by saying, “yes you can choose to do anything, but that doesn’t mean it is beneficial.  You can step beyond the boundary, but it is not healthy.

12b: I have the right to do anything”—but I will not be mastered by anything. 

sex has a habit of becoming an addiction – the more you feed it the more you want it.

13 “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food” Here is another saying – the stomach was made for food and the food for our stomachs.  Similarly, they argued, the body is made of sex and sex is made for our bodies. 

Paul responds—and God will destroy them both. 

Food and our hunger are transient things.  In comparison the body will be transformed into a new body after death.

The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. 

14 By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. 

God didn’t make our bodies for sex, he made them for Himself that is why he will give us a resurrection body someday.  Not so we can keep having sex, but so we can live with him.

15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! 

As Christians we say that Jesus lives in us.  If that is the case, when we have sex with another person and become one with them, we are actually making Jesus become one with them too.  Our sex unites God with our sexual partner. 

16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.” 17 But whoever is united with the Lord is one with him in spirit.

There’s that creation ordinance again - the ‘one flesh clause’ - and we begin to see that the spiritual aspect of sexual sin has consequences.  Do we begin to see that the use of sex is actually an abuse of the Lord’s intention for marriage (see point one).

Why?  The sexual union between a man and woman is a picture of the the church (the Bride) and Christ (the Groom) that is supposed to illustrate the most intimate and tender of relationships.

18 Flee from sexual immorality 

The KJV translates this as fornication – sex outside of marriage; adultery, without covenant.  Newer translations use the term sexual immorality, but in a world where there is no morality, fornication is a better word.

18b: All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. 19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honour God with your bodies.

We have given up our rights when we became Christians.  We have decided to live Second to One in our Sexuality and this means we realise that our bodies are not our own, they belong to God and therefore have to be used to honour Him.

This passage is not asking us to deny our sexuality, but to affirm them and live positively with them. The goal in our lives is to honour God.  Our sex life is actually an expression of our worship of God.  We can either choose to honour God with our sex life or we can offend Him.

Sex and sexuality are then best expressed with the context of Christian marriage.  

This means living strong when we are not married.

It’s OK to look right?  

Job 31:1: I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.

1 John 2:16: For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.

Lust begins with a look.  We can end up in a fantasy land of make believe.  Moral barriers become broken down in our minds before our bodies follow.  

Song of Songs 8:4:…I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. (cf. 2:7; 3:5).

There is a proper time for sexuality to be explored, within marriage and without pressure from the world to conform.

Summary:

There are boundaries in Scripture for the Christian:

• Sex is for marriage.
• Sex is for marriage and faithfulness to that spouse is required.
• Sex is for marriage and between a man and a woman for enjoyment and the procreation of children.

3. We Live in a Fallen World

The Bible may seem irrelevant to many here as you live in a world that is permeated with correctness, equality polices, and acceptance.  How do we as Christians deal with that?

The starting point always has to be what the Bible says for our personal beliefs.  As such the Bible doesn’t treat people differently because of their sexuality or behaviour.  The Word of God says that there are four areas of sexual union that will ultimately lead to harm and societal decay.  

Please note too that the Bible doesn’t differentiate in the way we do about sexual sin - they’re all a misuse of sexuality.

1) Sex with an unmarried person of the opposite sex – fornication, adultery, incest (including paedophilia).  We prefer terms like, “one night stand. ” (Lev 18:6; 1 Cor. 5:9-11; 6:9; Eph. 5:5; 1 Tim. 1:10; Heb. 12:16; 13:4; Rev. 21:8 and 22:15) 

2) Sex with a married person who is not your spouse – adultery (Ex 20:14; Lev 20:12; Deut 5:18; Luke 18:11; 1 Cor. 5:1-13; 6:9; Heb. 13:4).

3) Sex with the same sex – homosexuality.  (Lev. 18:22; 20:13 ; 1 Kin. 14:24; Rom. 1:24-27; 1 Cor 6:9)

4) Sex with animals – bestiality. (Lev 18:23; 20:15-16; Deut 27:21).

Sex outside marriage is that it uses our sexuality in ways that God never intended. 

So how do we live in a world that is miles away from the Bible.  Let’s briefly consider the gay issue. 

Same Sex Issues:

16 countries have legalised same sex marriage: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-21321731 

1.5% of population of UK identify themselves as gay or lesbian whilst 69% of people in Great Britain stated that they had a religious affiliation with Christianity.: http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/dcp171778_227150.pdf

These stats are not what the gay lobbyists want you to know and furthermore these are official government statistics from the last census.  They’re embarrassed by these stats.

The gay argument in brief (there are others, but these are the main ways they’d claim biblical support):

• The Bible only mentions homosexuality a few times in obscure texts, they didn’t know about homosexuality, and what was written now doesn’t apply.
• Leviticus is outdated and the Law doesn’t apply now.
• Jesus never mentioned homosexuality and therefore  would support any sexual relationship that is loving and kind.

Let’s look at these briefly in the order:

1. The Bible only mentions homosexuality a few times in obscure texts, they didn’t know about homosexuality, and what was written now doesn’t apply.

The Bible mentions this directly and indirectly in passages in the OT and the NT (Gen. 19:1-11; Lev 18:22; 20:13; Judges 19:16-24; 1 Kings 14:24; 15:12; 2 Kings 23:7; Rom 1; 1 Cor 6:9-11; 1 Tim 1:8-10; Jude 7).

Then point is the Bible is clear and consistent throughout that the gay lifestyle is not honouring to God and is a result of the fallen nature within us.

II. Leviticus is outdated and the Law doesn’t apply now.

This is a favourite as the gay lobbyists think this is a water tight argument, stating the the prohibitions on eating or pork or shellfish in nearby verses make it clear that Jesus, when He died, overturned these laws.

That is a poor hermeneutic (interpretation of Scripture).   A text without a context is a pretext.

In Leviticus we have some laws that were for the Jews only that were designed for their wellbeing but primarily to show their separation as a nation towards Yahweh; hence food prohibitions.  These were overturned at the cross as Acts 21:25 makes clear (the Jews did not impose the law on Gentiles).

Most of the laws in Leviticus 18-20 are binding on believers.  [Gays] only cite a few that aren’t; but here are the rest: 

• incest (Lev 18:6-18; 20:11-14, 17, 19-21), 
• adultery (Lev 18:20; 20:10), 
• child sacrifice (Lev 18:21; 20:1-5), 
• bestiality (Lev 18:23; 20:15-16), 
• theft (Lev 19:11), 
• lying (Lev 19:11), 
• taking the Lord’s name in vain (Lev 19:20), 
• oppressing your neighbour (Lev 19:13), 
• cursing the deaf (19:14), 
• showing partiality in the court of law (Lev 19:15),
• slander (Lev 19:16), 
• hating your brother (19:17), 
• making your daughter a prostitute (Lev 19:29), 
• turning to witches or necromancers (Lev 19:31), 
• not taking vengeance (Lev 19:17), 
• and loving your neighbour as yourself (Lev 19:18). - See more at: http://facultyblog.eternitybiblecollege.com/2014/05/review-of-matthew-vines-part-3-gay-sex-and-leviticus/#sthash.44CQ5fmN.dpuf 

If we follow the gay lobbyists hermeneutic then child prostitution, child sacrifice and bestiality must also be permitted. 

III. Jesus never mentioned homosexuality and 

therefore would support any sexual 

relationship that is loving and kind.

This would be an argument of silence.  That is, because something is not mentioned it cannot be binding.  The truth is we don’t have all the acts or words that Jesus ever spoke (John 21:25).  We do have the words that the disciples (under the direction of the Holy Spirit) felt were the most important to record.

Here’s the problem: Jesus did talk about relationships but because the gay agenda doesn’t like Jesus’ stance they pretend He said nothing.

Matthew 19:4-6: 4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Oops!  Jesus often clarified things that needed addressing and bringing correction where necessary (i.e Matt.5:38).  Why not do so here?

Because Jesus is not quoting the law, He is citing the creation ordinance, God’s design.

Question: so do we reject gays at Life Church?  Answer: no.

Here’s some things to help us as a church, starting with the Bible:

• Gays Can Become Christians, but like any other sexual sin, the behaviour begins to change.

1 Corinthians 6:9-11: Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Sadly over the years the Church has stopped reading at verse 10.  Verse 11 makes it clear that before they were Christians many of the Corinthian church were homosexual, adulterers and fornicators.  All that changed after they came to Christ.

You see the Bible always lists these sins as behavioural sins, not identity.  Today we’re told gay is an identity.  It’s not.  It’s a failed attempt to find happiness and peace that only can be filled with Jesus.

Gays want us to treat this sin differently and wear homosexuality with pride; but if we recognise them as identity issues then we have to accept all the other behaviours are too: people don’t introduce themselves as greedy, swindlers, adulterers.  

We need to understand that this behaviour is a fruit of being lost.  We cannot expect them to live any other way until they meet Jesus.

• We Must Be Compassionate Above All Else

We mustn’t judge. We were lost once too.  The Bible is written to all humankind but we can only begin to obey it’s commands when the Holy spirit is living within us.

Every response must be seasoned and gentle (1 Peter 3:15).

Charlene Hios: They could not argue me out of my homosexuality.  The first matter was to introduce me to Jesus, not to heterosexuality. See more of Charlene on this introductory video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqaAzhrbRQ0

• We Must have a Welcoming Culture as Church; not a Permissive Culture

Peyton Jones: What we need is “discipleship in community.”  People who define their identity by their sexuality need the church community as part of their transformation process to finding their primary identity in Christ.

Peyton Jones: Baptism has served as a natural unspoken barrier for people ready to change.

Once someone has become a Christian they begin to change.  Baptism begins to act as a “natural unspoken barrier” because it is symbolic of saying the old life is over and a new one has begun.  This would apply to all, not just gays!

• Responding to all those who misuse their sexuality:

1. Love them.  Do not expect the lost to behave in any way other than being lost.  
2. Compassion: when we are sharing the gospel we need to do so with tears not anger.
3. Point them to Jesus all the time.  People will not understand why their lifestyle is destructive if they don’t know Jesus.
4. Trust that the Holy spirit is going to work this through after their salvation and that the disciple ship process will bring the change.

Wrapping This Up:

Responding to God if you have fallen sexually:

1 Cor 6:11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.

1. Washed - trust God to clean you.
2. Sanctified - trust God to help you live clean.
3. Justified - trust God to pronounce you not guilty.